Overview
Freemasons are also often accused of staging the 1969 (and subsequent) moon landings, being devil worshippers, and leaving a treasure map on the back of the $1.00 bill for Nicholas Cage to stumble upon (or something like that. I never actually saw either of those movies).
Well, bear with me world, because I am here to propose a new and exiting Masonic conspiracy theory, and this one involves Football.
Background
Flash back about 700 years or so and what we might today call a trade union was formed by united European stone cutters. Presumably done to ensure fair wages and proper treatment, this is clearly the humble beginnings of the Free-Masons. In the ensuing centuries the outfit evolved into a secret society. Perhaps they still cut stones??
Flash back about 250 years ago and the United States is being founded by a group of former British subjects at what might have been the height of Freemason popularity. Multiple founding fathers were freemasons including George Washington and Ben Franklin. Freemasonry was spread through the colonies, and west of the Appalachians where the British had previously not allowed their colonists to settle.
Flash back about 70 years ago, and the Pirates of football are founded in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania - at the time a booming manufacturing town. In fact, the city's steel production was so prominent that a short while later the team changed it's name to the "Steelers"
After winning it's 6th superbowl, the city changed it's name to "Sixburgh" (they seriously did this officially for a day, or an hour, or something. And the mayor breifly changed his name to Steelerstahl).
Getting to the Point
I am suggesting that the success of the Pittsburgh Steelers is engineered by the Freemasons. I have the following evidence:
1. If you've ever heard Terry Bradshaw talk you'd think that the only way this guy could have won 4 world championships is if they were in the Special Olympics. Surely this couldn't have been the best quarterback in football. Roethlisberger, while seemingly a little more mentally nimble, doesn't fare much better.
2. A drive through Western Pennsylvania, West Virginia and Central/Eastern Ohio will reveal a shocking number of Masonic Lodges. Just look for the compass and square. Even Cincinnati and Cleveland have quite a few, but these cities also have a shocking number of Steelers fans.
3. Pittsburgh is much too small of a city to field such a popular and successful football team. Generally the wildly popular and most successful American sports teams seem to be based in the largest metropolitan areas (New York Yankees and Giants, Boston Celtics and Redsocks, LA Lakers, Dallas Cowboys, Chicago Bulls, etc).
But the Steelers don't seem to have the limited number of fans to draw from that plagues other smaller town teams. Their fan base is so spread out across the country, one has to wonder if Freemasonry and Steeler fandom aren't linked.
4. Steel working is basically the 2oth century equivalent of stone masonry. Steel is clearly as important to major construction today as stone was in centuries past.
Is it possible that the steel unions and the Masons have a united cause, with the Steelers the symbolic fighters of such teams as the Tennessee Titans (of Industry), or the New Orleans Saints (assuming they really are devil worshippers)?
Conclusion
A quick search of NFL Freemasons revealed only one name: John Elway. Another search found no connection between the Steelers and the Freemasons (hopefully this post will change that). I also know of no other Freemason conspiracy theories that involve sports in any way.
So what I'm saying is that I have no evidence whatsoever to back up any of this. Which actually seems to be a common theme among conspiracy theories, so maybe this is a good one!
It may also be worth investigating if the New England Patriots success is somehow related to the Yale-based secret society Skull and Bones.
What do you think Dank Game universe?
I'm totally sold.
ReplyDeleteomgwtf!?
ReplyDeleteamazing post.
They are all masons.
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