Bengals, Bearcats and even the Redlegs

Yesterday was a monster day in Cincinnati sports. The Bengals had to whittle down their rosters while keeping an eye on the waiver wire and possible trades. The Bearcats played their first game under new head coach Butch Jones, Former coach Brian Kelly coached his first game with the Notre Dame Fighting Irish, and the Reds were smack in middle of their final series against arch-rival St. Louis Cardinals.

Let's start with the Bengals: our boys in stripes made some surprising roster moves, but started the day with more obvious ones. Thanks to Twitter, this year fans were able to see in close to real time the actual order players were released, which was a good distraction during extremely non-competitive afternoon SEC football games. First to go were WR Matt Jones (18), K Dave Rayner and a rookie whom they clearly hope will be one their practice squad, WR Dezmon Briscoe.

Next on the chopping block was S Kyries Hebert, OT Issac Sowells and S Marvin White. Hebert thus far was the only cut you could call a surprise, though no one could truly have been happy with Cincinnati's depth at safety.

Who Dey Think Gonna Play 4 Dem Bengals?

Tomorrow is cut down day for the entire NFL. By 6:00 pm tomorrow the Bengals have to pare down their 75 player roster into only 53.

This may be the most promising Bengal's season of my lifetime, as the Bengals have actually enjoyed quality play at all starting positions, with the only real roster battles at back up and special team positions. What this tells you is that for once the Bengals are returning a starting roster that is actually talented (minus a few key pieces who've been replaced by reasonably sound free agent pickups, cough cough, TO).

So what Bengals can we look forward to watching on the bench this season and which can we mournfully send packing?

TE Dan Coats (86) vs. FB Joe Tronzo: Fui Vakapuna seems like an extended longshot to make the squad after missing the entire preseason with a shoulder injury. Tronzo, an undrafted rookie, has played well in his place, but Coats has a few years experience and the "versatility" to play tight end and fullback. It's highly unlikely both guys will make the squad, but I'm pulling for Tronzo. He'll almost certainly be on the practice squad if he doesn't make the team.

WR Jerome Simpson vs. WR Dezmon Briscoe: Since Cosby announced via Twitter that he has been informed he has made the squad, presumably only one WR spot remains open. Since nobody really thinks Matt Jones or Maurice Purify are going to make the team, it's down to the rookie Briscoe or the as of yet unproven Simpson. Since Simpson has finally started playing special teams, he'll probably make the team. Briscoe absolutely will make the practice squad if another team does not claim him however.

DL Pat Sims vs. DL Frostee Rucker (92): Rucker has more versatility on the defensive line, but Sims has been more consistant, starting a few games in place of Tank Johnson. Rucker has also spent much of his Bengal's career injured. Most would assume Sims makes the team over Rucker, but the "Snowman" has always seemed to be a Marvin Lewis favorite. Either could make it as a backup with another team, and one of them will probably get the chance.

S Kyries Hebert vs. S Rico Murray: This one's kind of a no win. Hebert is a great special teams player, but clearly not a great option at safety. Murray isn't spinning anyone's head himself. Safety is possibly the weakest position on the roster, so hopefully both guys are cut in favor of a better free agent cut from another team. Otherwise, I would think Hebert has the slight edge.

QB Jordan Palmer vs. QB Carson Palmer: There's only room for one Palmer brother on this team. Can Jordan oust Carson? Just wondered if anyone was still reading this.

Oh, it's kind of sad. I'm probably talking about some of these players for the last time.

HOF Game Heroes and Villians

Hey, it's Dank Game's 400th post, right as football season is upon us! As we just celebrated our 1 year anniversary, I won't make a big deal about our latest milestone. But I think we'll have to do something for 500 posts, a la Eddie in Time Square, but better.

Anyway, I have to say the Hall of Fame Game last night could have put me in a better mood. It's still preseason and many starters barely played, but the team didn't truly look ready. In Coach Marvin Lewis' defense, the first preseason game usually comes after another full week of training camp. But either way, much needs to be worked on.

So let's get started with HOF Game Villians:

1. QBs J.T. O'Sullivan and Jordan Palmer - what was that? Those interceptions were pitiful. I realize that most NFL teams don't truly have a viable backup quarterback, but we have some of the worst. We're going to have a lot of problems should Carson go down to injury for any stretch. Which brings me to number two.

2. The Offensive Line (that's like 14 players) - As many feared, the Bengals pass protection looked unstable. None of the Bengals quarterbacks had much time to get the ball downfield, so I'll forgive a little bit of sloppy play from Carson and company. This unit is the biggest question mark on the team in my opinion, and I'm not encouraged by what I saw last night.

3. Tight End Daniel Coats - Every time Coats suits up in a Bengals uniform a little piece of my soul dies. Pray no other tight ends get hurt so he doesn't make the roster.

4. Cornerback Adam Jones (24) - He really didn't have that bad of a game, but he isn't quite ready to go against number one WRs again. Having been out of football for over a year, I think he'll be more ready to go by when the season starts. Won't it be nice when both Leon Hall and Jonathan Joseph start though?

Ugly Sunday in Cincinnati

Because Teenage Mustache is on official Dank Game business in the City of Angels (make us proud, 'stache), I'll be incapably filling in with some NFL coverage.

It seemed like due time that the Bengals fucked up enough to keep the game out of reach in the final minutes. No Carson Palmer heroics could pull them out of this one. While the injuries to defensive tackle Domata Peko (awaiting MRI results on an injured knee) and defensive end Antwan Odom (out for the season with a ruptured Achille's tendon) hurt the Bengals chances of winning on Sunday, it certainly didn't boil down to just that.

The second quarter was the only moment the Bengals looked alive on offense, scoring on a run by Cedric Benson, a tippy toe catch in the back of the end zone by Laveranues Coles, and a field goal at the end of the half by Shane "where-da-party-at?" Graham. During the second half, the Bengals just couldn't get the ball down the field. The offense was simply horrendous. Something has to be done with tight end Daniel Coats, who can't catch a pass for his life. When he finally did manage to catch one, of course he fumbled it. Not only did Coats do his best to fuck shit up, but tight end J. P. Foschi did his part in fucking up as well. Just a few plays after the Bengals recovered a Texans' fumble in the final minutes, Foschi would fumble the ball after catching a pass, putting an end to any hope of a "Cardiac Cats" comeback. I thought the Bengals drafted some really great tight end named Chase Coffman. As far as I know, this guy hasn't even played. What's the deal?

The defense was looking decent prior to Pecko and Odom going down. I can't really comment on this much though, as I was chasing my dog outside for at least 5 minutes of the first quarter after she escaped through my friend's front door. Not that I would've had any insight if that didn't happen, though. I do know that Odom blocked a field goal before his injury though, and that was pretty sweet. From that point on, Houston had its way with the Cincinnati defense.

All I can say is this was a thoroughly disappointing game. Despite a decent effort from Ochocinco, he didn't score a touch down, which meant no Mexican Jumping Bengal celebration. It's my belief that had this celebration happened, it would have energized the Bengals and Paul Brown Stadium enough for them to fight through the injuries and pull this one off.