Sunday, September 6, 2009

2009 Bengals - Inside scoop

Yesterday, yours truly worked for 12 hours at ground zero: Paul Brown Stadium.

The best part: I spent some of that time in the Bengal's locker room.

So guys, pay attention. This is likely the only time I will have any sort of "scoop" on a sports team. Unfortunately I could not take any pictures, but here's what I've got:




First and most important - Carson Palmer. I didn't see him run or throw footballs, but he was walking around nimbly without any brace on his ankle. It appears that he is already recovered from the ankle he sprained in the preseason.

Next up Andre Smith. Fuck. Whoever reported that his stress fracture would only keep him out for 7-10 days is either a spin-master or a moron. Days after the injury, he was milling around on crutches at the pace of an elderly woman. Maybe it doesn't matter so much. He wasn't likely to contribute much in the early goings of the season anyway after his 90 day holdout. I anticipate that he'll be place on the Physically Unable to Preform list to start the season, and not placed on the active roster until the last possible moment.

Rey Maualuga. Dude is hilarious, and might as well live at Paul Brown Stadium. On a day with no practices he still put in something like 12 hours. Interestingly enough, he and Shayne "Where-da-party-at" Graham were palling it around for much of the day. Quite the odd couple.

Graham is returning from a groin injury, but looked fine. The club had confidence enough to release their camp replacement kicker, so I'm sure he's recovered fully. David Jones is also recovering from an injury, but he looked to be in good shape, walking around quickly and pain free. Scott Kooistra (unsurprisingly nicknamed Kooister by his teammates) - another injured Bengal backup - didn't look to far from returning to the playing field either.

I saw several other players as well, including Bernard Scott, Michael Johnson (who is tall as fuck), Brandon Johnson, Dhani Jones (super nice guy) and Dennis Roland, plus coach Marvin Lewis. The only real disappointment is that Chad Ochocinco was there, but didn't really say or do anything entertaining. Not that he was an asshole or anything, but I've come to expect nonstop antics from him. He did work out in boxing shoes and a big robe that says Ocho Cinco on the back, so that's a least one nice touch. He was also incredibly ripped. Apparently that boxing regiment he endured this off season paid off.

Well, that's all I've got. Until next time (which as far as Dank Game inside scoops go might be never) this is Mustache signing off.

Let's see you get an exclusive scoop on the Heat, SlimMcFatTits!

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